THE WALL: a blog of Baptist Voice Ministries

Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands….

When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.

“You’re running around with other women,” she told her mate.

“Eve, honey, you’re being unreasonable,” Adam responded. “You know
you’re the only woman on earth.”

The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be
awakened by a strange pain in the chest. It was his darling Eve
poking him rather vigorously about the torso.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Adam demanded.

“Counting your ribs,” said Eve.

In Shakespeare’s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes
when you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed
firmer to sleep on. that’s where the phrase, “goodnight, sleep tight”
came from.
*
The sentence “The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.” uses
every letter in the alphabet. (developed by Western Union to test
telex/twx communications)
*
The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a
letter is uncopyrightable.
*
When opossums are playing ‘possum, they are not “playing.” They
actually pass out from sheer terror.
*
The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year
*
because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the
weight of all the books that would occupy the building.
*
The term “the whole 9 yards” came from W.W.II fighter pilots in the
Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the . 50 caliber
machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded
into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got “the
whole 9 yards.”
*
The phrase “rule of thumb” is derived from an old English law which
stated that you couldn’t beat your wife with anything wider than your
thumb.
*
An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
*
The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the
“General Purpose” vehicle, GP
*
The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth II, moves only six inches for each
gallon of diesel that it burns.
*
Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.
*
No NFL team which plays its home games in a domed stadium has ever
won a Super Bowl.
*
The first toilet ever seen on television was on “Leave It To Beaver.”
*
Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.
*
In Cleveland, Ohio, it’s illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.
*
It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a
year’s supply of footballs.
*
Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating
are already married.
*
There are an average of 178 sesame seeds on a McDonald’s Big Mac bun.
*
The world’s termites outweigh the world’s humans 10 to 1.
*
The 3 most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca-Cola, and
Budweiser, in that order.
*
When Heinz ketchup leaves the bottle, it travels at a rate of 25
miles per year.
*
Ten percent of the Russian government’s income comes from the sale
of vodka.
*
On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.
*
In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world’s
nuclear weapons combined.
*
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a
month after the wedding, the bride’s father would supply his son-in-law
with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer, and because
their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the “honey month”
or what we know today as the “honeymoon.”
*
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old
England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them to
mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It’s where we Get the
phrase “mind your P’s and Q’s.”
*
Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into
the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they
used the whistle to get some service. “Wet your whistle,” is the phrase
inspired by this practice.

The newspaper obituary operator received a phone call. The woman on
the other end asked, “How much do funeral notices cost?”

“Five dollars per word, ma’am,” came the response.

“Good, do you have a paper and pencil handy?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Okay, write this: ‘Cohen died.’ ”

“I’m sorry, ma’am, I forgot to tell you there’s a five-word minimum.”

“Hmmph,” came the reply. “You certainly did forget to tell me that.”
After a moment of silence, the woman continued, “Got your pencil and
paper?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Okay, print this: ‘Cohen died, Cadillac for sale.’ “

The Memorial

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex was staring up
at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The
plaque was covered with names, and small American flags were mounted on
either side of it.

The seven-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time,
so the pastor walked up, stood beside the boy, and said quietly,
“Good morning Alex.” “Good morning pastor,” replied the young man,
still focused on the plaque.

“Pastor McGhee, what is this?” Alex asked. “Well, son, it’s a
memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service.”
Soberly, they stood together, staring at the large plaque. Little Alex’s
voice was barely audible when he asked, “Which service, the 9:00
o’clock or the 11:00 o’clock?”